Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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