and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
is that a dick in a sweater?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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