everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
