Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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