after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Randomize
