omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
