you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
