I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I want to be your penis for a week.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
