I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
