Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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