wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
