just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
