Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
This is my gift to your gina
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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