I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
