i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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