OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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