so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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