i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
