It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
