careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
