I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
