That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
