their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
