What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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