I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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