I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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