Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
