It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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