My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
Randomize