I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize