It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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