I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Randomize