i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Come see our sink grown plant.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
