Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
NoShamevember. You game?
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I think my moral compass just broke
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
