make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
