Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
