tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
