I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
