i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
