I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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