I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
