Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
