he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
