how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
