porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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