Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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