so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
