Yo dont text me then not text me
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
