Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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