I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
